#3. Girls are like Internet Domain names, the ones I like are already taken

#4. Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning

#6. There are 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary and those who don’t.

#11. My Software never has bugs. It just develops random features.

#13. The glass is neither half-full nor half-empty: it’s twice as big as it needs to be. 

#14. Passwords are like underwear. You shouldn’t leave them out where people can see them. You should change them regularly. And you shouldn’t loan them out to strangers

#18. Concept: On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape button.

#19. Alert! User Error. Please replace user and press any key to continue

#15. Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue… 

#10. I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code